Why doesn't your husband want you? My husband doesn’t want to work: what should I do? Why does a wife not want a husband, sex, intimacy, replacing natural desires with “marital duty”

Sometimes it happens that a husband does not want intimacy with his wife. Unfortunately, there are always reasons. Let's try to highlight the main ones.

The intimate side of family life is one of the main ones. Therefore, if the attraction to his wife is not as strong as before, a man often needs the help of a sexologist. Many married couples do not experience problems in the intimate sphere before marriage, why then do they appear so often? And in each specific situation, naturally, the reasons are quite diverse and individual.

Reasons for lack of sexual desire

A man’s lack of desire disrupts the measured rhythm of family life. Sex is quite important in a woman’s life; she just needs to feel wanted. Of course, a man’s lack of desire has a negative impact on the emotional sphere of relationships.

Baby in the house

One of the more common reasons that reduces sexual desire in men is the birth of a child. On the one hand, even this very idea is absurd, because his beloved wife gave him a son (or daughter). But in fact, this is quite a strong test for a man; he needs to understand the whole path that a woman needs to go through to give birth to a child. Particularly difficult is being present at childbirth. Many dads take the birth of their first child quite seriously. Now all their thoughts are busy planning a decent future for their beloved daughter or son.

Young mother and intimacy

Most often, men experience fear of intimacy with their pregnant wife. They believe it will have an adverse effect on her or the child. If this behavior is encouraged throughout pregnancy, then there is no certainty that changes will occur after childbirth. Returning to the former joys of intimacy will be difficult, and sometimes even impossible.

Male jealousy of the baby

If a woman is breastfeeding, this should also not be done in front of her husband. Subconsciously, a man, observing this picture, no longer feels the desire for intimacy with his wife, since he perceives her more often as the mother of his child, and not as a sexual partner.

Realizing that previously only his object of adoration - breasts - now belongs to someone else is quite difficult for him.

The situation becomes even more complicated if the woman whom a man loves so selflessly begins to be associated with the image of his mother. Pregnancy does not prevent her from taking care of her husband and taking care of him.

But the appearance of a baby changes everything; now the woman spends most of her time with the child. And, having ceased to receive his portion of warmth and tenderness, the man becomes jealous and perceives the baby as his rival.

The birth of a child, naturally, adds a sufficient amount of additional troubles to a young family. Time for rest is now becoming less and less. Most of the time is devoted to the baby. And living with parents or in a one-room apartment adds even more problems. At the end of the day, young parents are already so exhausted that they have absolutely no strength left for intimacy.

If your husband has another

Many women are confident that their men's attraction decreases if... And they consider this the main reason why a husband avoids intimacy with his wife.

Such a man is not only not in the mood for sex, but is also not eager to go to bed with his wife.

This behavior often appears in men who are in love or have satisfied their needs elsewhere. In this way, he tries to divide the territory of his presence, abstracting himself from his partner, to whom he no longer feels attraction and is forced to live out of necessity.

Money issues and problems at work

If a man reacts sharply to everyday problems and problems, this can also cause a lack of sexual desire. After work, the husband in such cases comes home very tired and his only desire is sleep.

Do not forget that the man is entrusted with the responsibility of providing financial support for the family. And at work they can often arise. Hence the lack of desire for intimacy with his wife.

All these reasons, accumulating, only aggravate the situation, and the man’s condition is similar to the condition of a squeezed lemon. Then, for relaxation, he prefers computer games, football or reading.

There is no desire to fulfill marital duty for the sake of show.

Why does sexual interest fade?

The reason for the lack of sexual desire may be that she no longer excites him, like a woman. If a marriage lasts for a long period of life, the spouses have already become accustomed to each other, then, naturally, they will have an acute problem of lack of interest in the ordinary, everyday.

The spark and passion that was there before goes away, but monotony and boredom remain. Now everything that previously gave pleasure has become boring, each other’s sexual preferences have been sufficiently studied, a lot has been tried.

The influence of envious people

Unfortunately, it also happens that your man has simply been jinxed. You may not believe this, but there are already proven facts that there is a spell of damage and the evil eye: betrayal, illness, separation, financial lack of money.

Well-known astrologers like Tamara and Pavel Globa, Vasilisa Volodina and others now without fail recommend adhering to the rules that any relationship must be protected from the evil eye.

As a fact, you have probably observed the presence of the Red Thread against the evil eye from Jerusalem more than once among famous stars of show business, fashion, and politics. After all, their happiness is sometimes the envy of millions of people!

You must adhere to these rules! Believe it or not. But also beware of fakes!

The red enchanted thread from Jerusalem must be ordered exclusively from representatives of the Holy Land from Israel, which is guaranteed by a certificate of authenticity!

Beware of fakes!

The Red Thread from Jerusalem cannot cost one dollar! And it is impossible to buy it on sale on Aliexpress!

Your housewife look

A woman stops paying much attention to her appearance. Especially on weekends, when there is no need to worry about what kind of robe she is wearing or the hairstyle on her head. All this makes her less sexy in the eyes of her husband. This absolutely does not mean that he relegates her to second place, but he considers her less and less as a sexual partner.

Male body problems

Lack of desire in a man can also be caused by certain diseases of the genitourinary tract. Prostatitis and sexually transmitted infections affect decreased erection.

In this case, turning to specialists is the best solution in the current situation.

Sexual desire is reduced by certain groups of medications that a man has to take. This is largely due to the fact that certain groups of drugs have such side effects. This series includes tranquilizers and antidepressants.

If your husband does not want intimacy with you, quarrels and swearing will not be good helpers in solving this problem.

You need to tune in to the fact that it is better to discuss everything together. The reasons that lead to the lack of sexual desire are so varied, and if you don’t find the main one, you may lose a cozy family haven forever.

The candy-bouquet period is always wonderful: long romantic walks, kisses under the moon and calls to your mobile phone every ten minutes. Enjoying this wonderful time, we are sure that it will be like this forever. But the gray, monotonous life that hangs over relationships in the future is capable of absorbing even the most sincere and passionate love. Women often do not want intimacy and try to avoid it in any way.

Main reasons

Not with my husband... This problem is often raised on various forums by concerned ladies. Their unenviable marital status is commented on by all and sundry, often mocking the cold woman or accusing her of frigidity. Instead of reading all this nonsense, it is better to turn to a psychologist who will tell you about the main reasons for reluctance. Experts identify several pitfalls that stand in the way of your “sexual” happiness:

  • Stress. They do not allow the wife to relax and tune in to the desired wave.
  • Diets and taking birth control pills. They can reduce libido levels.
  • Some character traits of the husband: rudeness, passivity, untidiness, poor hygiene.
  • Hormonal changes in the body due to the birth of a baby.

In these cases, the problem can be solved by stopping hormonal drugs, waiting until health is restored after childbirth, simply by talking frankly with the man about his lifestyle, habits and character. If the reason is not found, and the woman continues to say: “I don’t want sex with my husband!” - this situation needs to be understood in detail.

If the husband is not macho

Perhaps this is where the problem lies. And a woman cannot admit to a man that his sexual abilities, alas, do not give her the desired pleasure. When they first met, the girl did not notice this, since romance hid a lot. Going to the movies, candlelight dinners and “cuddling” smoothed out the rough edges at every turn, and you didn’t attach much importance to incompatibility in bed. But now the scales have fallen from my eyes. And the woman is not entirely comfortable next to her chosen one. And she mentally asks herself the question: “I don’t want a husband... What to do in this situation?”

Psychologists advise a girl to directly tell her significant other what doesn’t suit her. Together, the problem will be solved. If the reason is lack of arousal, you can ask your husband to pay more attention to petting. Let him seduce again, become playful, passionate. A man is obliged to take off his old family swimming trunks, in which he is used to lying in front of the TV, and wear revealing and sexy underwear. If the lady is not satisfied with her chosen one, he must bring her to the peak of pleasure in another way: oral caresses, for example.

Incomprehensibility

This condition is familiar to every woman. She is 100% sure: the process is far from amazing and enchanting, but she cannot understand where exactly improvements are needed. She simply doesn’t like going to bed, and she sighs doomedly: “I don’t want to sleep with my husband...” As a result, it’s easier to refuse than to rack your brains in search of unsuccessful and annoying moments of physical intimacy.

In this case, the lady will still have to find time to sit down and figure it out. Because no one else can solve the problem except herself. If the husband is correct, attentive, gentle, neat, loves his wife’s cooking and respects her mother, then the girl needs to look for the reasons deep inside herself. Perhaps she just needs a break or some variety in positions and locations. Then, so that the obstacle called “I don’t want intimacy with my husband” does not arise, you can move to the sea or to the mountains. A change in the usual atmosphere, new acquaintances and adventures can revive former passion and protect the couple from an unwanted divorce.

Perseverance

The couple did not agree on temperaments: he wants several times a day, but two sexual acts a week are absolutely enough for her. And when the husband again “desires” his soul mate, she wants to run wherever her eyes look. The wife does not ask herself: she firmly knows the answer to this question - she got it. Yes, this happens often. The tireless rabbit in the person of the faithful pesters a woman, even when the surrounding reality is not conducive to physical intimacy: she is busy in the kitchen or preparing a report for a conference. Or maybe I’m just not in the mood to go to bed here and now. In addition, the girl is offended that they look at her only as an object of desire, ignoring her two higher educations, knowledge of Shakespeare in the original and written philosophical articles.

There are two ways out. The first is that the wife refuses, but runs the risk of finding out in six months that the chosen one has a mistress. The second is to agree, relax and have fun. And this is the best way, since with age such moments will arise less and less often. And in general, be glad that they want you. Many women can only envy this state of affairs.

Flaw

A woman who is accustomed to repeating: “I don’t want sex with my husband” is often missing something. Psychologists say: lack of communication can lead to feelings between spouses cooling down. In this case, the couple needs to spend as much time together as possible: go on picnics on weekends, take vacations and time off at the same time. If there are children, then it is better to leave them with their grandmother so that the husband and wife can fully enjoy their shared time.

In this case, a man should take an active part in his wife’s personal life, share her interests, support her plans, and engage in a common hobby. Don’t be alarmed, no one forces the head of the family to cross-stitch, but he is quite capable of looking at it together. In addition, this will delight the lady; she will take a fresh look at the relationship in marriage, especially at its physical side. The chosen one should take an active part in household chores, go shopping together and help the children with their homework. In this way, he will relieve her everyday life: the lady will not get tired, and the desire for intimacy will arise in her much more often than before.

Complexes

They develop from childhood and prevent the beautiful half of humanity from living and loving. Any physical flaw makes a wife feel embarrassed about her body. And at the next bachelorette party, tell your friends: “I don’t want to sleep with my husband!” A girl may avoid intimacy if she has small or too large breasts, a scar on her stomach or crooked legs. Convincing your wife that she is loved for who she is is sometimes very difficult. If a lady is so fixated on the problem, the defect can be corrected through surgery. A consultation with a psychologist who will teach a woman to love herself no matter what will also help.

Coldness in a relationship can appear even when a girl feels a lack of sexuality, beauty, or skills as a seductress. She is ashamed of her flabby belly and silently envies the fit beauties whom her gentleman is eyeing. To feel like a confident coquette, a lady should exercise, eat right and enroll in geisha courses. will change her attitude towards sex - in a positive way.

Is a lover the answer?

Many women try to cut it this way. It seems to them: if the husband does not evoke the proper emotions and sexual attraction, they should look elsewhere. And then, as if by magic, a new employee comes to the office: smart, handsome, elegant, smiling. The husband clearly loses in comparison, especially if you remember the pile of dirty socks under the bed or his habit of picking his nose. Therefore, the new employee attracts the girl like a magnet, promising her mountains of heaven in the form of care, love and, of course, high-quality sensual sex.

The woman thinks: “I love you, but I don’t want a husband. I won’t get a divorce, but I can give myself pleasure.” But is the game worth the candle? Many ladies, having tasted the forbidden fruit, say no. Firstly, strict secrecy is needed, which takes a lot of time, effort and money. Secondly, remorse will keep you up at night. Thirdly, the lover will turn out to be the same man, prone to throwing socks around. Therefore, it is unprofitable to have a gentleman on the side.

Four justified no's

I don’t want to sleep with my husband... How often can you hear this from friends, co-workers, or even from your own mother. The problem is as old as time, and often the woman is not to blame for it. Agree, it’s one thing to go to bed with your significant other when you don’t bear the burden of caring for the house and children. And it’s completely different when you’re torn into a million pieces in order to have time to go to work, feed your family, wash everything, iron it and clean up at the end. After such a marathon, you just want to fall on the bed and not move. At the same time, the husband’s attempts to seduce cause nervous spasms and attacks of aggression.


Sexologists say that there are four arguments in favor of women who do not want to forcefully make love:
  • Dulling of sensations, which causes depression and
  • development of frigidity.
  • The appearance of gynecological problems.
  • Loss of attractiveness.

And to prevent this from happening, try to find the cause of your coldness and solve it using the methods described above.

What to do if you don’t want sex with your husband?

If none of the above helps, you need to go another way. Psychologists call the most effective, trouble-free and useful method the ability to fall in love with your chosen one again. This is quite difficult to do, especially when you have ten years of marriage and a couple of children in the next room. For everything to work out, psychologists recommend focusing on positive qualities: pay attention to the fact that he has very strong sexy arms, but close your eyes to the hanging “ears” of fat on his sides. Although it is necessary to hint at problems in the figure. It is better if you attend training together.

“I don’t want a husband, what should I do?” the girl asks herself. At the same time, he doesn’t suspect: one has only to remember the candy-bouquet period, and a feeling of warmth and tenderness will spread throughout the body. She needs to re-imagine those moments when he looked into his eyes in love, kissed his hands, proposed, was on duty at the windows of the maternity hospital and set off fireworks at the birth of his first child... These memories will make it clear that there is no closer person. Love will be reborn, and with it passion, the desire for intimacy, and the thirst for new sexual experiments.

There were times when there were jokes among men about the eternal “headache” of a partner when trying to offer her sex. In addition, it was believed that women needed family status and children, but they did not receive pleasure from sex. A decent man, in order to acquire heirs, occasionally tormented his wife with his caresses, and received the rest from girls of easy virtue. What was there, from the point of view of intimacy, behind the oak doors of palaces, behind the curtains of Victorian windows and in simple peasant huts - no surveys were carried out. Firstly, the topic is indecent, and secondly, sociology has not yet been invented. In any case, the man initiated the sexual relationship. And the idea of ​​women's initiative in this area was simply unacceptable.

But those blissful times for men are gone forever. At the beginning of the 20th century, Mr. Freud made public the existence of the female orgasm. A little later, ubiquitous anthropologists, with the support of famous travelers, proved that the fact of the existence of the latter was not known only to Europeans, and in the East and Asia it has been inscribed in the context of erotic culture since ancient times.

For about half a century, Europe and America digested the discovery. Then the Second World War began, there was no time for that. Then the sexual revolution broke out and the era of total female erotic enlightenment came. Now a new demand is being put forward to the stronger sex. His symbol is a wife in a peignoir, in an inviting pose, demanding from her hero “a bag of pleasures every evening.” What about the man? And he, the scoundrel, ignores the new peignoir. I came home from work, had dinner and fell asleep. An ardent lady is crying in the kitchen. There is a terrible question in her head: why doesn’t he want to? Both today and yesterday... And the beauty’s head is visited by trivial thoughts:

  • he has a mistress at work;
  • he has a mistress on the side;
  • he is mired in debauchery, and he has mistresses everywhere;
  • he stopped loving me;
  • I’m scary and fat, I need to see a plastic surgeon and get liposuction;
  • he is a budding impotent.

All options are equally terrible, but ignorance is worse than knowledge. And in the morning, with gloomy persistence, she begins to ask what is wrong, throws hysterics, forgives him for his sins and begs him not to break off the relationship. He desperately tries to explain the reasons for his lack of desire, but, alas, no one believes his excuses. And already the thought firmly settles in his head: “Something is wrong with me.” An ideal victim for a selfish psychologist!

Reasons for a husband's reluctance to sleep with his wife

Here's the thing. Latin Americans and other sultry machos, perhaps, indulge in passion five times a day. But their job is mainly to lie under a palm tree. And on average in Europe, men 30-45 years old have intimate relationships a little more than a couple times a week. And that's okay. Even once a week is fine. They can do more. But why? Men of this age have a stable intimate life, and energy is spent on a career, work, trading on the stock exchange, and hobbies. In addition, Russia is a country with a temperate and cold climate. Southern passion (as well as southern impulsiveness, hyper-emotionality, violent gesticulation) is not characteristic of our men. There are exceptions, but they rather confirm the rule. On vacation, a surge of passions may well happen, but for a mature person who knows how and loves to work with his head, it is simply a pity to spend several hours a day on sex, even if it is sex with the woman he loves. Why several hours? But because it is not proper for a real man to quickly take possession of his lady and then snore against the wall. He approaches sex creatively. And a creative approach, even three times a day, takes too much time.

  1. He's simply tired. Ten or more hours of decision making per day. Huge responsibility. Complex tasks. Daily communication. He comes home devastated. And here all he needs during the week is peace. There are several beautiful ethnic traditions that fit into the theme. For example, English men in the era of Queen Victoria, coming home from work, had dinner, then read the newspaper. And there was perfect silence at home. Children in the nursery. The wife is nearby, but is silent: the father of the family is resting. And among Jews, the Shabbat tradition includes a rule: on Saturday evening, the husband must take possession of his wife. Nothing is reasonably said about the other days of the week. And such traditions arise for a reason.
  2. Sex has become routine. For many years there is not a single fresh note in it: the same faces, the same poses, the same place. I'm just tired of it. There are more interesting things to do.
  3. Perhaps the wife has gained weight. It’s interesting that if a man gets fat (even to the point of obesity), he still considers himself damn attractive. And if a wife gets fat, about 40 percent of men become disappointed in her as a partner. Here it is worth mentioning a woman’s lack of self-care and her lack of beautiful, figure-flattering underwear. The world is generally harsher towards women. Even if the wife is as slender as a reed, people will often prefer her younger counterpart. Just at the age of about forty, some men carry out a planned replacement of their life partner.
  4. He prefers watching porn films. He’s such a dreamer (especially if his partner is unable to satisfy his exotic fantasies).
  5. His potency is really fading. Don't be afraid of this phrase. It does not mean an inability to have sex, but a lesser need for it. The very ability to have sex sometimes persists into old age.
  6. The house is no longer his fortress, but a place where claims are made against him, bills are presented to him, and any achievement is criticized. And if the bed also becomes a springboard for a scandal, then sex is firmly associated with it.
  7. He lacks tenderness. He is a man and, perhaps, would take the initiative himself. But when he is required to immediately fulfill his duty, the attraction disappears along with the remnants of the romantic mood.
  8. He is sick. What else can you say?

The reality is that the strength of a woman's desire increases by the age of 30-35, when men's needs for sex decrease. The worst thing a woman can do is throw reproaches. This will only breed mutual disgust. Difficulties in intimate life are one of the situations in which partners begin to receive dividends from the trust capital invested in the relationship. Perhaps the cause of the troubles can be easily eliminated. Perhaps he needs help. There may be many individual nuances. In any case, the problem can be solved together.

If sex happens only once a week or even two, then let it be unforgettable, an extravaganza of passion or an ocean of tenderness. The bed is not a place for reproaches and showdowns! There is another charming tradition: if partners have a fight, make up before going to bed together. And always sleep together.

And also... Why not try to start complimenting him instead of complaining? How big and beautiful he is. Amazingly smart. With beautiful eyes, a statuesque figure (or a cute tummy). With skillful, courageous hands. He's so sexy it's impossible to resist. You can also remember the Chinese tradition and compliment not only him, but also his significant addition. He is also beautiful, and strong, and skillful, and stately.

Do not forget that God invented work, and Satan invented idleness. Perhaps the one who makes too many claims is simply bored?

And, as banal as it may sound, you need to devote more time to communication. It is known that depressed women have a sharp increase in their need for sex. After all, sexual intercourse is significant proof of her demand. In fact, it does not require sex, but attention and care. Massage, conversation, evening gatherings over a glass of wine... The development of harmony, a sense of unity with your loved one can bring more happiness than the best orgasm. Because happiness is long-lasting, but orgasm is short.

There are also vibrating massagers. But that is another story.

How to behave in such a situation and why you shouldn’t panic if you and your partner haven’t made love for a long time, says family psychologist Tammy Fontana.

PHOTO Getty Images

Tammy M. Fontana is a psychologist specializing in marriage, family and romance.

“There are a lot of myths around the topic of “men and sex”. They say that men are constantly horny. That they are ready to take the first woman they come across to bed if she agrees. That they are insatiable in bed is already the merit of the bestseller about the difficult relationship between a student and a millionaire. So why is it then that half of my clients are women who complain that their partner doesn't have sex with them anymore? Because, in fact, these are common clichés that have no relation to reality. When it comes to sex, men and women are the same. Some people feel arousal several times a day, while others only need a little love in the evenings or on weekends. It is not at all necessary that in the first case it will be a man, and in the second - a woman. Clients have come to me more than once with complaints about the lack of sex, but there are also many who ask what to do if a partner demands it too much or too often.

Contrary to stereotypes, a man is not at all ready to give in to passion at any time of the day and anywhere. On the contrary, most often he requires a special environment and mood, especially if we are talking about a permanent relationship. But I can tell you what happens in a woman’s head when her man refuses to have sex with her. At first she is simply perplexed, and then begins to look for the problem in herself. She changes her haircut, tries to lose weight, starts playing sports, changes her clothing style and, of course, emptys store shelves with sexy lingerie. If all these methods do not work, the woman switches to a man. As a rule, she has only one option - problems with potency. And then she categorically sends him to the doctor.

But the catch is that there can be many reasons why sex is postponed and postponed until later. And of course, you can’t expect everything to happen by itself. Sex is a part of a relationship that requires as much attention and effort as anything else.

Therefore, refrain from blaming your partner and do not immediately look for the reason in yourself if the quality or frequency of lovemaking does not suit you. Those who are dissatisfied with their sex life tend to think that this is a personal problem of one of the partners, and not a problem in the relationship. But I advise you not to shift the blame - this is a problem both personal and general. As I have noticed over the years of my practice, people often do not see the real reason for difficulties in their sex life. The first step to solving a problem is recognizing that it exists. Don’t hide behind the phrase “he just doesn’t want to have sex with me!”, but rather figure out what the real reason is. Here are a few reasons why a husband refuses to make love to his wife.

1. Lack of both sexual and personal compatibility between partners.

2. Partners moved away from each other.3. Lack of emotional intimacy. Your husband may not receive adequate support from you and may not feel loved or valued.4. A man may not want sex with you if you have recently often criticized his actions and lifestyle.

5. Alcohol. It's hard to admit, but it can be a pretty big reason.6. A man may no longer be attracted to his wife's body. Perhaps her figure is now completely different from what it was at the very beginning of their relationship.7. Perhaps the partners' interests have completely diverged, and the husband has nothing more to talk about with his wife.8. Another woman, even a potential one. If your partner has registered on one of the popular dating services, this is a clear sign of dissatisfaction with your relationship.9. Depression.10. Fear of one's own age, horror of aging.11. A man may doubt his sexual abilities, especially if he failed last time and you were not sensitive enough to react to it.12. Perhaps sex is causing him pain, in which case it's time to visit a doctor.

13. He is bored with sex with his wife, he finds it monotonous, so he doesn’t want it anymore.14. He is afraid of criticism after sexual intercourse (especially if he has heard criticism before).15. Stress, work problems and financial difficulties.16. Health problems: overweight, increased fatigue, anxiety.17. General fatigue at the end of the day.18. He wants to end the relationship with you.19. Perhaps you have denied him sex so many times, citing illness and headache, that he has lost interest in taking the initiative in this matter.20. He stopped seeing his wife as a sexual object. Perhaps for him now you are just a woman in a robe and pajama pants with stretched knees.

As you can see, there are at least two dozen reasons why a man may refuse sex with a woman. Don’t criticize your partner or put pressure on him - try to figure it out together and find a way out.”

For more information, visit the Psychology Matters website.

www.psychologies.ru

What to do if your husband doesn't want sex?

Previously, you made love several times a week, and sometimes more often, but now moments of intimacy have become less and less frequent. You see that a man is avoiding you, moving away, ignoring you. He is looking for reasons not to make love to you, and you do not understand why he behaves this way. What to do if your husband doesn't want sex?

First of all, try to identify the reason why he suddenly lost interest in an activity that all men simply adore. This will not be easy to do, because there are actually many reasons:

He is very stressed, overworked at work or depressed. Perhaps he spends all his energy on solving some serious problems, and therefore there is simply no resource left for making love. Analyze, is everything okay with him? Does he have difficulties at work? Or perhaps he has recently begun to play sports intensively, and all his energy flows there? Beginners who give their all in the gym do not yet know how to properly distribute their strength, and therefore can spend more on sports than they should;

He has lost interest in you. That is, he wants sex, he just doesn’t want you. I will say right away that this does not happen just like that, without a reason. Basically, a man loses sexual interest in a woman whom he no longer respects. But you can stop respecting for any reason. And for his sloppy appearance (or even scary), for the fact that his wife constantly blows his mind, controls him all the time, or does not consider him a man at all. Think about it, is there something about you or your relationship that doesn’t suit your man at all? If you know that the reason is you, then to the question: “What to do if your husband does not want sex?”, the answer is: “Eliminate this reason and return your husband’s interest”;

He has a mistress and is tormented by guilt. If a man has a mistress, but does not feel guilty, then he can not sleep with his wife either because he leaves all his strength to his mistress, or because there is another reason why he does not want you. In any case, if your husband cheats on you, it means that he found in another woman something that he did not find in you. What is this? Respect, acceptance, admiration, care? You definitely need to find out!

He has health problems. And not necessarily prostatitis or sexually transmitted diseases (although it would not hurt to exclude this). Many diseases lead to decreased libido. It’s commonplace that metabolic and gastrointestinal disorders, the appearance of allergic reactions, liver problems - all of this affects a man’s desire to have sex. Therefore, watch his health!

Hereditary impotence. This happens to a man when his paternal ancestors had the same problem. A man may not yet be 40, but his libido disappears and problems with impotence appear. At the same time, physically he can be absolutely healthy and nothing can bother him. How to exclude this reason? Find out how things are with the sex life of your husband's father or grandfather in the past.

Age. If you compare his sexual performance at 25 years old and now, when a man is 35, then it is not surprising that there will be a significant difference between them. The greatest surge of sexuality in a man is from 17 to 28 years old. And then hormones are produced at a different pace and libido begins to decline. For a woman, everything happens the other way around; she only reaches the full flowering of her sexuality at the age of 35. But that’s another topic.

If you don’t know what to do if your husband doesn’t want sex, don’t rush to put on seductive lingerie or run to a sexologist. Perhaps the reason lies not where you are looking for it. In general, it’s best to have an honest conversation with your husband; he most likely knows what happened between you in your sex life.

With love, Yulia Kravchenko
There are even more useful things in my Instagram and Telegram accounts, subscribe! Instagram Telegram

www.twiy.ru

The husband does not want intimacy with his wife, reasons and where to look for the guilty


Sometimes it happens that a husband does not want intimacy with his wife. Unfortunately, there are always reasons. Let's try to highlight the main ones.

The intimate side of family life is one of the main ones. Therefore, if the attraction to his wife is not as strong as before, a man often needs the help of a sexologist. Many married couples do not experience problems in the intimate sphere before marriage, why then do they appear so often? And in each specific situation, naturally, the reasons are quite diverse and individual.

Reasons for lack of sexual desire

A man’s lack of desire disrupts the measured rhythm of family life. Sex is quite important in a woman’s life; she just needs to feel wanted. Of course, a man’s lack of desire has a negative impact on the emotional sphere of relationships.

Baby in the house

One of the more common reasons that reduces sexual desire in men is the birth of a child. On the one hand, even this very idea is absurd, because his beloved wife gave him a son (or daughter). But in fact, this is quite a strong test for a man; he needs to understand the whole path that a woman needs to go through to give birth to a child. Particularly difficult is being present at childbirth. Many dads take the birth of their first child quite seriously. Now all their thoughts are busy planning a decent future for their beloved daughter or son.

Young mother and intimacy

Most often, men experience fear of intimacy with their pregnant wife. They believe it will have an adverse effect on her or the child. If this behavior is encouraged throughout pregnancy, then there is no certainty that changes will occur after childbirth. Returning to the former joys of intimacy will be difficult, and sometimes even impossible.

Male jealousy of the baby

If a woman is breastfeeding, this should also not be done in front of her husband. Subconsciously, a man, observing this picture, no longer feels the desire for intimacy with his wife, since he perceives her more often as the mother of his child, and not as a sexual partner.

Realizing that previously only his object of adoration - breasts - now belongs to someone else is quite difficult for him.

The situation becomes even more complicated if the woman whom a man loves so selflessly begins to be associated with the image of his mother. Pregnancy does not prevent her from taking care of her husband and taking care of him.

But the appearance of a baby changes everything; now the woman spends most of her time with the child. And, having ceased to receive his portion of warmth and tenderness, the man becomes jealous and perceives the baby as his rival.

The birth of a child, naturally, adds a sufficient amount of additional troubles to a young family. Time for rest is now becoming less and less. Most of the time is devoted to the baby. And living with parents or in a one-room apartment adds even more problems. At the end of the day, young parents are already so exhausted that they have absolutely no strength left for intimacy.

If your husband has another

Many women are sure that the attraction of their men decreases when someone else appears on the side. And they consider this the main reason why a husband avoids intimacy with his wife.

Such a man is not only not in the mood for sex, but is also not eager to go to bed with his wife.

This behavior often appears in men who are in love or have satisfied their needs elsewhere. In this way, he tries to divide the territory of his presence, abstracting himself from his partner, to whom he no longer feels attraction and is forced to live out of necessity.

Money issues and problems at work

If a man overreacts to everyday problems and stressful situations, this can also cause a lack of sexual desire. After work, the husband in such cases comes home very tired and his only desire is sleep.

Do not forget that the man is entrusted with the responsibility of providing financial support for the family. And at work, problems with superiors can often arise. Hence the lack of desire for intimacy with his wife.

All these reasons, accumulating, only aggravate the situation, and the man’s condition is similar to the condition of a squeezed lemon. Then, for relaxation, he prefers computer games, football or reading.

There is no desire to fulfill marital duty for the sake of show.

Why does sexual interest fade?

The reason for the lack of sexual desire may be that the husband has stopped loving his wife, she no longer excites him like a woman. If a marriage lasts for a long period of life, the spouses have already become accustomed to each other, then, naturally, they will have an acute problem of lack of interest in the ordinary, everyday.

The spark and passion that was there before goes away, but monotony and boredom remain. Now everything that previously gave pleasure has become boring, each other’s sexual preferences have been sufficiently studied, a lot has been tried.

The influence of envious people

Unfortunately, it also happens that your man has simply been jinxed. You may not believe this, but there are already proven facts that there is a spell of damage and the evil eye: betrayal, illness, separation, financial lack of money.

Well-known astrologers like Tamara and Pavel Globa, Vasilisa Volodina and others now without fail recommend adhering to the rules that any relationship must be protected from the evil eye.

As a fact, you have probably observed the presence of the Red Thread against the evil eye from Jerusalem more than once among famous stars of show business, fashion, and politics. After all, their happiness is sometimes the envy of millions of people!

You must adhere to these rules! Believe it or not. But also beware of fakes!

The red enchanted thread from Jerusalem must be ordered exclusively from representatives of the Holy Land from Israel, which is guaranteed by a certificate of authenticity!

Beware of fakes!

The Red Thread from Jerusalem cannot cost one dollar! And it is impossible to buy it on sale on Aliexpress!

Your housewife look

A woman stops paying much attention to her appearance. Especially on weekends, when there is no need to worry about what kind of robe she is wearing or the hairstyle on her head. All this makes her less sexy in the eyes of her husband. This absolutely does not mean that he relegates her to second place, but he considers her less and less as a sexual partner.

Male body problems

Lack of desire in a man can also be caused by certain diseases of the genitourinary tract. Prostatitis and sexually transmitted infections affect decreased erection.

In this case, turning to specialists is the best solution in the current situation.

Sexual desire is reduced by certain groups of medications that a man has to take. This is largely due to the fact that certain groups of drugs have such side effects. This series includes tranquilizers and antidepressants.

If your husband does not want intimacy with you, quarrels and swearing will not be good helpers in solving this problem.

You need to tune in to the fact that it is better to discuss everything and find a compromise together. The reasons that lead to the lack of sexual desire are so varied, and if you don’t find the main one, you may lose a cozy family haven forever.

www.expert-psychology.ru

Why a man doesn't want intimacy


There are so many jokes about women who immediately get headaches after the first mention of sex. But everything in the world is impermanent. Now you can increasingly hear women complaining that their men have lost their desire for them. As a result of the study, it was calculated that after 18 years of age, men begin to gradually lose interest in sex. Why did things turn out this way?

What does it feel like for a woman in such situations? The man stopped wanting her, doesn’t explain anything, and she begins to beat herself up that she’s no longer attractive and sexy, that she’s tired of her partner, etc. But this may not be the reason at all.

Reasons why men don't want sexual intimacy

Women are accustomed to the fact that as soon as they put a smile on their face, men immediately begin their hunt. At first this is true, but the further the relationship goes, the less sexual attraction between partners becomes. If you want to maintain passion, you will have to constantly look for ways to seduce a man. But you shouldn’t blame everything on yourself; sometimes problems really arise because of your partner.

Depression

When a man is overwhelmed by problems, he can no longer think about anything else. Financial shortages, problems at work and even quarrels between you put a lot of pressure on him and he no longer wants any sex. Don't panic, talk to him and try to help him get through this dark period.

Lack of sleep

Sleepless nights squeeze all the strength out of a man, and all he dreams of is to quickly crawl under the covers and put his head to the pillow. Understand him and let him regain his strength. In the meantime, you can go shopping or relax in a beauty salon.

The woman is no longer attracted to him

At the beginning of the relationship, you tried to do your best: you picked out clothes, put on makeup, did your hair, but now all this is in the past. A dressing gown and hair in a bun do not attract a man, but only make him “look to the left.” Regain your attractiveness and the man will immediately attack you as before.

A disease that the man himself doesn’t even know about

If your intimate life has stopped very abruptly, then this may be due to an undiagnosed illness. See a doctor and everything will fall into place.

He's cheating on you

And this can happen. Talk to the man and if it turns out to be true, let him go. Don't torture him or yourself.

Homosexual

Some men, embarrassed by their gayness, try to change everything by marrying a woman. But, since this does not solve the problem, they do not feel any attraction to their wife.

As you can see, the reason that your man doesn’t want sex could be anything. We need to find out what's going on and find a way out of this situation.

www.womensecrets.pro

After a certain time of a marriage that is successful in all respects, a cooling occurs between the spouses, including in intimate relationships. Everything changes, moves and changes, especially relationships between people. And at one moment the man suddenly discovers a new feeling in himself: “I don’t want a wife...”. What to do if your former passion has sunk into oblivion, but you don’t want to destroy your family?

What to do if you don't want a wife

Most men go through this poisonous subconscious feeling when one single thought is spinning in their brains: “I don’t want to sleep with my wife.” And it may not be related to the changed appearance of the spouse. More often than not, the reluctance to sleep with your wife is not due to her rounded shape, or even to age-related changes.

Reasons why men refuse intimacy in marriage

Yes, male lust is born in the eyes. But it goes through the brain. The information seen by the eyes is processed by the consciousness, which at the output issues a verdict: “We swam - we know!” or “She is your friend!” This is the best case scenario. A man is not attracted to his wife because:

  • He has known her for a long time - several years of marriage.
  • He knows her all - every cell and every breath.

That is, a man loses interest in his wife of many years, as an “object of hunting.” You no longer need to “hunt” for her, and you can no longer expect anything unusual from her.

How to solve this problem

Of course, first of all, you need to decide for yourself what exactly you don’t like about your wife? Changed appearance? Her behavior in bed? Or uncomplaining submission to her husband in everything, because the wife completely trusts her husband? What repels?

Did you find the reason? Destroy her! How? Turn on your brains and look there for the notorious “male wisdom”, which representatives of the stronger sex present as opposed to “female logic”.

Options for solving the problem

  • Separate for a certain time. Timing is extremely important! For example, my husband should go on vacation alone to the rivers of the Altai Mountains to catch whitefish. Separation will bring passion back into your relationship, and passion can brighten the dullest married life.
  • Talk to your wife. She also wants to change the current situation for the better. Agree with her about changing her image, about a swimming pool, fitness and solarium. Doesn't even want to hear?! Buy her an annual subscription to the nearest fitness club - she will have to go there so that the money does not go to waste!
  • They say that cheating with another woman can help a man look at his wife with new eyes. What are you saying? “I don’t want to cheat on my wife”? Then change your wife - a wig, long gloves, fishnet stockings, high heels, bright red lipstick and a slim-body dress will turn a decent married woman into a depraved and lustful one. Have you slept with a charming, sweet and kind girl for many years? What if a woman “hostess” appears in front of you, in a leather swimsuit and with a whip in her hand? Try to refuse sex with her... A teacher and a schoolgirl, a policewoman and a thief, a nurse and a maid! How many “other” women have you had, Casanova?!
  • Doesn't even want to hear about all of the above? Use crazy talk in relation to your own wife - a typical technique for pick-up artists to seduce a woman. The essence of this technique is that you yourself, in the process of preparing a mind blower, will experience the excitement of a “hunter for fresh prey.” And you put your wife in new, atypical conditions for her.

A roof-raiser is an act that blows the minds of your wife, forcing her to look at you with different eyes, and making your heart beat faster. A typical example of being crazy is giving a bouquet of flowers for no reason. Or even a “brain explosion” - sending your wife a basket of flowers to work. And always with a postcard - from you, your legal spouse. You can take her away from home to the bosom of nature without agreements - like, “stole”. True, in this case, at least 3 days of complete abandonment of the environment familiar to both of you are necessary. Or another example of mind blowing - a joint parachute jump. Or rafting in a team on mountain rivers. Even if you just run a bath for her, throw floating scented candles into the water and cover the surface of the water with rose petals, this will definitely blow your mind away.

In organizing mind-blowing events, the main conditions are surprise and complete secrecy until they are carried out in the intended form. There should be surprise not only in the timing of execution, but also in the chosen process of presenting the mind-blowing experience. For example, if you have never let your wife drive your car in your life, buy her a cooler car than yours. Or give yours, tied with a red bow.

There is also a category of egoists who declare: “I don’t want a wife after giving birth!” The advice to such males is simple: masturbate if you want to save your family and relationships. A woman’s postpartum condition goes away faster if her husband helps her in everything. And after pregnancy, any woman becomes more desirable. Motherhood adorns any spouse, even if you have lived with her for 50 years...

Related publications